Fashionable, but unable to tell fact from fiction (testing4l) wrote,
Fashionable, but unable to tell fact from fiction
testing4l

Click click click click....clunk. *smack* *reboot* *DING!* clackety clackety clackety!

I need something short to restart my LJ. Voila, ebugle obliged with a meme!

YOU HAVE ANSWERS! I HAVE QUESTIONS! YOU HAVE QUESTIONS WHICH REQUIRE ANSWERS TO ASK THE QUESTIONS!

Leave me a comment saying which part of testing4l you like best and you will be graced with a series of questions for your answers and your questions will be answered because of your answers.

Hooray for mutual recursion!

EDIT: Huh -- I thought *everyone* had seen this meme. Ok, so here's how it works. You comment to this with the part of testing4l that you like best. I reply back with 5 questions. You post the responses in your journal along with this header.

1) Given that God is infinite, and that the universe is also infinite, would you like a toasted teacake?

I believe that I prefer human companionship to that of a toasted teacake. I've never understood people who can only love a baked good, but it is only inevitable in an infinite universe, so they must be inevitable too, since they happened.

2) How would you try to escape from The Village?

#6 proved on three separate occasions ("Chimes of Big Ben", "Checkmate", and "Many Happy Returns") that escape by sea was possible. In addition, the other #6 found escape and return by sea. However on more than one occasion, escape by air was halted ("Arrival", "The Schizoid Man", arguably "Many Happy Returns").

I believe that escape by sea is unquestionably the best way to go, barring the ability to find the road from The Village to England (as seen in "Fall Out"). In the meantime, I would attempt to live in areas unseen by the cameras (As shown in "Chimes of Big Ben")

If somehow, my escape was barred, I would replace my number badge with one that said "Number One" and I would proceed to rule the village with an iron fist. It would be the only logical assumption at that point.

From there, an army of guards could proceed to overwhelm other micronations. Eventually, I would have the manpower to invade France. Following France, a landing on Britain would seal my eventual control of Europe. After that, it leaves only negotiations with the Slavic commonwealths and America to ensure my place in history.

3) How do you want your funeral to be held?

I have almost no desire to have my body or life commemorated. Roll me over in the sheet I die in and put me out somewhere for the scavengers.

I have things I'd want done upon my death. I would approve of a convention of friends and acquaintances of mine. I know lots of cool people and the very least that they'd do is be cool together. Why not?

I've always been fond of gemlikeflame's suggestion that she would slap my corpse in the face and say "Wake up, testing4l. It's not funny anymore. Wake up!"

Maybe someday I'll fake my death and see what happens. If I did, I'd come back in 5 years to laugh at everyone who believed it.

4) What is the best number?

The exact amount of money that the Treasury department knows to be in circulation. In several bank accounts under my secret identity, of course.

5) How many monkeys and how many type writers would it take to write your life story?

Thanks to advances with electric typewriters and networking suites (See RFC 2795), I estimate a sliding scale for parts of my life where circumstances were carefully calculated (Fooling my mother into thinking I eloped, for example) vs. the usual random crap I end up involved in (Say, is that a pancake in there?).

I expect that more than 7 billion monkeys would be required since approximately that many humans are engaged in failing to outsmart me thus far. One can assume that each monkey would be at peak productivity with a typewriter for each limb. I recommend instructing them on the hazards of RSIs.
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